Is Nothing Ever Simple?

I ordered two items from a website I've used before. Most of their stuff doesn't appeal to me, but they have some good sales occasionally. The two things I ordered were a winter face mask to give as a gift and a pair of slippers for me.

An email acknowledging the order said I was entitled to a free magazine subscription. I've gotten these from them before, and it's a good deal. I usually give away the subscription, and this time I wanted to order a technology magazine for my son. But the website neglected to give me the code necessary to place the order, so I emailed their Customer Service. "Raquel" replied, telling me the code had been sent.

"I never got it, Raquel."

Next, "Jerome" said he'd sent me the code.

"It didn't arrive, Jerome."

We went through this with "Patrick" and "Olivia" before I finally got the code.

The winter face mask arrived without a problem.

I was eager to get the slippers, and happy to see a package in my mailbox yesterday. But instead of dark brown slippers, inside the box was a pair of white plastic Crocs. So I wrote to Customer Service again.

"Nadine" responded immediately. I explained that I wanted the slippers, so I would return the Crocs. She said she had arranged for the return, and attached a label for me to print out. The label said I was returning the winter face mask.

I wrote back. No, I said, the winter face mask was fine. I received a pair of Crocs in error. I want to return them so I can get the slippers I ordered.

That's okay, the reply from "Horace" said. He explained that he had arranged for the return, and attached a label for me to print out. The label said I was returning the slippers.

Politeness be damned. "NO NO NO!!" I wrote. I wrote a few other things, pointing out that it was their mistake that had landed the Crocs in my mailbox instead of the slippers I fervently wanted. (Well, I didn't say fervently. I thought it might be misinterpreted.)

So "Adam" wrote back and said I should use the label Horace sent. He said it would be fine, but added that they couldn't guarantee my slippers were still available.

I printed out the label, which states in bold letters that the slippers are being returned. A photo of the slippers is on the label too. I slapped it on the box containing the Crocs, and sent it on its way.